Am I alone (poem by tech bro)*

Am I alone in thinking
there are far too many creatures in this world
when we only need a few?

Enough perhaps
to keep them in a zoo or two
or stuff them away
in a museum for another day
when we need things like them
though…
I can’t imagine why we would

Unless…
How much would you pay
for this bear’s head?
How much, instead
for the bear to keep it?
And what about we make a deal
for this here baby seal?

And am I alone in thinking there should be 3, maybe 4 kinds of birds?
A black one and a brown one and maybe a blue kind of bird (I don’t really care)?
And then that’s plenty
because birds are always in trees
And am I alone in understanding that trees are money?
Am I alone in liking money
more than birds and trees?

And have you noticed that birds and bears and seals are stupid?
Am I alone in this?

If it’s birds you want, take a look at this AI bird I made
from a bird template based on real birds
which no longer exist
and about time too
because in a world without birds
I can sell this to you

With AI Smartbird you just say “Hey, Bird,” and Smartbird will answer all your questions
fulfill all your needs
with absolutely no need for trees
which we’ll need to burn in any case
to fuel the answers to the many questions you have for Smartbird

“Hey, Bird… Am I alone in this?”

Still, I am told that some people need companionship
companionship other than money
and for that we have social media dog
just click “pet” on him
no need for actual petting

And then someday, robots!
Am I alone in this?

*I liked the idea of this poem, but it never really came together for me. I got tired of trying to make it work, so here it is for now. Someday I might revisit it and make it better. Maybe AI can help.


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2 responses to “Am I alone (poem by tech bro)*”

  1.  Avatar
    Anonymous

    Adam

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  2. AI fïed Avatar

    This reads like satire that slowly turns into something more uneasy. The humor lands first, but underneath it there is a sharp critique of how easily living things get reduced to inputs, commodities, or inconveniences once efficiency and profit become the only measures that matter. I especially like how the voice keeps asking “am I alone” while clearly describing a world that ends up very lonely. The closing admission that it never quite came together actually fits the theme well. The discomfort feels intentional, like the poem itself resists being optimized.

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adam overland in front of a painting of a white squirrel

Hi. I’m Adam Overland, a writer based in Minneapolis. These are the meanderings of my muddled mind. I’ve written humor columns for various print publications, so naturally that’s dead and here I am, waiting for the last gasp.

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